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| ...Lee Daren dreams of becoming famous songwriter, but even if her dreams come true, will she ever get to write songs for her favourite band, Westlife? |
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You may have heard of me, Lee Daren? No? Umm, do you know "Fights Hill","4U","Intima"? These are very famous names. Oh, I see some nodding, yeah, well you probably wonder: "o.k, what has she got to do with them?". Well, if you open their albums and go over the song list you'll find my name, you can also find it under the "thank you's" part and under the song titles as the writer. Yes, that's my job. I write songs for others, some of the biggest hits and love songs have been written by me - don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to brag about it, not at all. Fact is, it took me a long time and hard work to get where I am now. You see, it seems that everybody has to be good at something. In school I wasn't too much in anything, well at least not in anything that made you popular. I mean, I wasn't among those geniuses that everyone wanted to study with, and I wasn't much of an athlete either. It seemed that I wasn't good at anything that counted. Well, anything but writing. Yes, writing - I was no.1 when it came to writing. My literature teacher tried to develop my talent and push me forward, sending my work to competitions and newspapers. If I had listen to her I could have been very popular and stood out from the crowd, but there was one tiny problem - I was shy. I was so shy that I didn't dare open my mouth or use my writing outside my drawer. I don't know, just the thought of showing the whole world my poems, especially the personal love songs, seemed so frightening and unthinkable. The only one who knew and read all my work was Sam, my best friend. She never laughed at me and always encouraged me to evolve, in fact, if it hadn't been for her I wouldn't be here at all. She is the one reason and I owe her everything. She used to play the violin in concerts and stuff - she was hard into music and she was the one who opened me to this world. We used to listen to all kind of bands. One day Sam came to me excited - "There's this new band called Westlife, you have to hear them they are absolutely amazing, they are the best that I have heard in a long time. You are going to love them" - she said and placed the phones on my ears. Magic! Their music was incredible, I was flooded with waves of emotion. But more than that, their words, it seemed as if I had written the lyrics for them, they were singing my life. Sam also said - "You know Lee, your poems are really similar to theirs, maybe you should try sending some samples to a few artists, who knows, with a little luck and lots of your talent, you'll be Ronan Keating's song writer." I giggled - Ronan Keating? I wish, but there's no chance - I turned down the idea. Later that night I couldn't sleep, my head was full of questions, maybe, maybe, I do have a chance? I write well, maybe it's worth a try. The next morning I printed three of my poems and without telling anyone I send them to three managers of bands that I liked. I added a letter in which I offered myself as a writer. Forgot all about it. A month later I was home from school, I met my mum on her way out to her afternoon shift - "Lee, dear, there's food on the table, be good" - she kissed me and went to the door and then turned around and said - "Oh, you received a letter, it's on your bed, bye honey." - "Bye" - I mumbled and went towards the kitchen. That's how it was, I used to see my mum either early in the morning before morning shift, or at night before I went to sleep. My father left us when I was little, leaving behind many debts. I never complained, some people have it worse, but sometimes I dreamt of living in a normal house and a having a mother who could rest, I imaginied winning the lottery and never letting my mum work again. I sighed, took some food and went to my room. I sat on the bed staring at the plate thinking about the things I would do with that money, when I felt something rustle under me. I got up and found the letter, I'd almost forgotten about it. I scanned it, bored - "To Lee Daren from Virgin records co." Virgin? What do they want from me? All I knew was that they were this major record company. I started opening the latter and laughed - maybe they want me to be the sixth spice girl, yeah, this is probably a begging letter for me to come and save them with my beautiful voice and looks.. - yeah, right! I started reading the latter - "Dear Lee, we received your poems, we are very happy..bla bla bla - I skipped on looking for the "but we are very sorry" part, when to my surprise I saw the words - "Please contact us immediately, you are what we are looking for, please do not connect anyone else, we need you" - and again - "Contact us at this num..." Me? They need me?? Not to contact anyone else??? I couldn't believe it, is this some kind of a joke? No! I checked the envelope and the signature, official company paper. I stared at the wall. They want my poems? Oh, my god, I couldn't believe it - I mumbled to myself over and over again. O.k - I breathed deeply and checked the letter again "Call as soon as possible" Well, I tried to calm down -- lower your expectations, Lee -- I said to myself. The phone rang on the other end and a voice identified itself as 'Sandy'. - Yes? - Oh. hi,my name is Lee, Lee Daren, and I sent you. - Yes, yes - she stopped me joyfully - I'm so glad you called. We here at the company have read your poems, and you have got it! Big time! I don't know how you did it, but you really fit in, that's exactly whats going on in music today.. what words, what emotions.. to cry, really, what a talent - she was gushing over the phone. And I found myself for the first time in my life speechless. - Look, we have to set a meeting, contract, to make it official, your poems have reached the big boss and he just loved them, so when can we meet?? I managed to mumble a date and we hung up the phone. For 15 min I was sitting with the receiver in my hand, when the weird engaged sound from the phone woke me up , I placed it back and immediately the phone rang. - Hallo? - I said still very far away. - Lee, it's Sam what's up with you the line was busy for hours.. - Sam - I said - you are not going to believe it.. A few minutes later I had to hold the receiver away from my ear so that I wouldn't be deafened from the crazy noises that came from the other end. - I'm so happy for you! - Sam said after she had calm down a bit - Oh, Lee, this is so wonderful, finally someone understand what a genius you are, don't forget your friends when you are famous.. - she added smiling. - No way - I said - Not a chance. On the day of the meeting I was very nervous, I didn't know, what you were meant to wear to this kind of meeting? Something formal or maybe bohemian or just simple jeans and a T-shirt? Eventually we decided, Sam and I, on wearing a black skirt and an elegant golf shirt. I took with me a couple more poems to show them and got on the bus down town. I got off and found myself standing in front of this huge building. The receptionist asked me suspiciously where I was heading and whether I had an appointment. I answered and immediately her entire attitude changed - Oh, - she said - So you are the famous writer that everyone talks about - She looked aside and leaned closer to me, whispering - I heard that the Backstreet Boys want to work with you - she smiled - Before you are even signed here the rumor is out that we got ourselves a talented writer, the phone doesn't stop ringing - she laid back ignoring my shocked face and moaned - Oh, I wish I hade your talent, you are so lucky, going to work with all this celebs that any girl would give her right hand to be with in the same room alone. She moaned again and pressed the intercom - Mr..Ston, Lee Daren is here. A man's voice replied - Excellent, show her in. I wont bore you with the business formality stories, lets just say that that was only the beginning, and before I knew it, I was writing for artists like "Bryan Adams, George Michael, Mel c.." and not only did I write for them, I also had to meet with them, they wanted to know me and let me know them so that I'll know more precisely what they wanted to say, what kind of songs they were looking for. This job was everything I had ever dreamt of, and in time I built myself a reputation.. and my mum could cut down one shift - I was happy. But like every artist I had my preferences, people I wanted to work with, at the top of the list you could find - Ronan Keating and then, U2, The Corrs, Westlife etc. One day I received a phone call from my agent telling me smiling that she had something very important and special to tell me. What is it? - I asked curiously. Ask who is it - she answered - Or even better come down the office, there's someone here who wants to meet you. I drove to the office, wondering who could that be. The first thing I saw was his back, short blond hair, then he got up and turned around. "Lee, I'm so happy to finally meet you, I've been wanting to do that in a long time, to work with you, and now," he stopped and held out his hand smiling, "Forgive me for not introducing myself, Ronan Keating." I shook his hand weakly, he had to introduce himself? As if I didn't recognize him immediately. "Its a great honor to meet you," I said "I, too, have been wanting to work with you for a while now." We sat down and started talking, he told me about his new album and himself, then he said, "Actually, I prefer writing my own material." What a disappointment.. I tried not to show it on my face. "As a matter of fact," he continued "I turned to you so that you'll help my band, they are working on a new album and need some help with the writing, you have a reputation of a hit machine, I'm familiar with most of your work and very much like your style, so I thought if you had the time and the interest, maybe you'll be willing to work with them." He smiled again and tapped on his head. "Them, I mean, Westlife, do you know them?" My eyes were like saucers, DO I KNOW THEM?? I breathed deeply and managed to say, "I would be happy to." He smiled. "Excellent!" He said and shock my hand. "In that case, you'll come to the studio next week, meet the lads, and we'll see how you get along, in my opinion its going to be a winning combination, perfect!" You can imagine Sam's reaction when I told her. Screaming, hugging.. and some more screaming. She already got used to my meeting with celebs but Westlife were my favorite band. A week later I went to the studio, a girl directed me to the top floor where they were working, I walked into the waiting room and told the secretary who I was, she smiled and buzzed the intercom. "Guys. Lee's here." Guys? They've all been waiting for me?.. I felt hot. The door opened and they came out, first Nicky and Shane next Kian and Bryan and finally Mark. Surrounding me with smiles they held out their hands. Nicky said "We're so happy that you could work with us, we simply admire your talent, you are a genius." I blushed and mumbled, "Thank you", shook their hands and said that it was an honor for me to work with them. They led me to the recording room and we sat around a table. "So," asked Kian "How you do it? I mean, how do you do it? Is it just sitting in front of a paper starting writing and "boom" you have a hit? Teach us the magic." I smiled and explained that its not quite like that, and that the work is much less glamorous, but if they are interested we could have a little try. I played with them a game I sometimes used to break the ice with. We took a paper and every one of us had to write a line, anything that comes into our minds, even the weirdest things, fold the paper and pass it on to the next person, eventually I unfolded the paper and read to them our first joint poem: "I ran out of yellow socks" - Kian "And I'm dead tired" - Shane "The pizza always comes late on cold days" - Bryan "And the ball is in. He scooooores" - Nicky "You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen" - Mark "Because I like fish only in swimming suits" - Me We all laughed and the ice was broken. We started talking, I asked about their wishes and things they wanted to accomplish or say, to get an idea for what they would like the songs to say. Well, also cause I was dying to know. The day passed quickly and we even managed to write one song. I parted from them and scheduled another meeting for the next week. On my way back, on the bus, I went over the day again in my head, staring at the passing view with a grin on my face. I remembered the faces they made when I read their lines. They were all making really funny faces, well, all except for Mark, maybe I was imagining but when I read his line he looked straight at me and was very serious, there was a moment of silence, a bit awkward, for a moment I forgot that the others were around and just drowned in his amazing blue, then I caught myself and removed my eyes reading my line. We all laughed but I had a feeling.. oh, I don't know it's probably just my dreams that I wish would come true. I've decided to stop thinking about it. What would Mark want with a simple girl like me. Later that night I was sitting in my room when the phone rang, I answered expecting to hear Sam when a man's voice asked "Lee?" "Yes?" I said, my heart starting to pound like crazy, could it be.. "Hey, it's Mark, I hope I'm not disturbing you or anything," He asked in his warm voice. "No, no! Not at all!" I said quickly "Umm, is everything alright?" I asked a little worried, maybe they had changed their mind.. "Yes, yes, everything is fine, don't worry, I was just, I was wondering if it's alright if I, mean, could we meet up tomorrow?" He asked and I felt tension in his voice. "You guys want to meet tomorrow instead of next week?" I asked, not really understanding. "Not us guys, me" He was silent "Oh, I'd love to, are you sure that everything is fine?" I asked, all questions. "It will be after tomorrow" he mumbled and quickly turned to agree on the time and place. I put the phone down, confused, what did it mean? Mark wants to meet me, why? Wnd why am I so excited about it, I only just met him, I don't even know him, I.. so many questions were rolling around in my head. We were to meet in a park near a newspaper stand. He was already there when I arrived, tall and handsome, wearing his long black coat. "Hey," I said. He saw me and his face shined. "Hey" he smiled happily, "I'm so glad to see you." He grabbed my hands and shook them, and then as if he had realized what he was doing he quickly let go of them, embarrassed. "Wanna walk?" he asked "Lets" I nodded and we started walking side by side, not talking, the tension was unbearable. "Lee," he led me to a bench facing a lake "Let's sit, I've got to talk to you, and I've gathered enough courage to do it, so I'm going to talk now before I lose it." He looked me in the eyes passionately "I think you are the most wonderful, beautiful, smart, amazing girl I've ever met..." He grabbed my hands again and I didn't know what to do but blush "The minute I saw you I knew my life would never be the same, I couldn't think of anything but you, I couldn't concentrate on anything, the lads laughed at me saying I'm flying," he smiled shyly which made his dimples show, which made him even more beautiful "I'm shy and this, " he pointed at us "This is something I don't usually do, actually I never did anything like this before, but with you..I felt I had to, you know?" He took my hand close to his heart, I could feel it beating fast. "I" mumbled "I don't know what to say." He stopped me "Don't say anything, for now, let yourself get to know me and then decide." He sounded urgent "I, please, I have to get to know you more, you, you'll agree to meet again?" How could I say no? This amazing man was telling me things that sounded like magic in my ears and I.. discover that I want to know him more. We arranged to meet at the same place the next day. And so, all week we met. We talked about him and his family and me and my father and the whole writing business. We talked and talked and time flew, it's like we only just met and it's night already and he walks me to the bus station. There we go on talking until the last bus came and I have to leave. It seems that we'd never run out of things to talk about. When I'm with him, I just feel so good, he understands me like no one ever did. At the day of the meeting with the rest of the lads I arrived with so much written material, all the conversations with Mark had inspired me and I felt so creative, like I had never been before. I realized that the happiness comes from this man, that I.. love. That it is love and its wonders. At the meeting Mark and me were inseparable, the lads noticed and smiled, I showed them what I wrote, they go over the songs and looked at me amazed, Ronan came in and went over them too then he stared at me overwhelmed. "How do you do that?" He asked, "How do you capture the meaning and the moment in such simple words, it's just incredible!" I smiled and looked at Mark. He looked back. Ronan said "Well, we have here enough material for two amazing albums, working with you has been most successful, we'll send you a copy of the album and its going to be perfect thanks to you." They all agree. Suddenly I realize that that's it! It's over, and I feel so sad. They bring a bottle of champagne to celebrate, I drink but don't feel the taste, the smile stretched on my face like a string about to break, I keep blinking to block the tears. We shake hands, I shake Mark's hand, he tries to meet my eyes but its too much for me. I let go, mumble "good luck" and "keep in touch" and run out, tears rolling down my cheeks. Outside it's raining, the raindrops combine with my tears, how appropriate to whow I feel inside. I stop in an empty bus stop and sit down all wet and hurt. A shadow falls over me, I don't care, whomever that might be, I don't mind! Something warm covers my shoulders. I lift my eyes to see Mark sitting next to me, his coat wrapped around me, I try to hide my tears but he takes my hands "You are freezing," He says and warms them between his hands "You know," He continues "You run very fast, you almost got hit by a car earlier, didn't you notice?" "No!" I mumble "and who cares". I pull my shoulders indifferently. "I do." He turns my head to face him and looks strong in my eyes "I care, how am I supposed to live in this world without my other half, without the one who stole my heart and I'm forever hers?" He stokes my wet cheek softly "You are not running from me, Lee, I love you and I'm not giving you up so quick." I try to answer but he stops me with a soft kiss on my lips, a kiss that clears many things, that convinces me that I want to be with this man always. "I thought I lost you." I whisper "It was horrible cause I love you so much too" and he kisses me again. "I'm not going anywhere, at least not without you, o.k?" He asks and smiles deep in my eyes. I want to answer but for the second time in my life I find myself speechless. but he knows. |